You, Me & Us

Our people. Our relationships.

You, Me, Us is all about us, as queer, trans* and takatāpui people, having healthy relationships with each other, and what we can do when things go wrong. It is always OK to talk about relationships with someone you trust or with one of the organisations listed on this website or in the You, Me, Us booklet. By talking about healthy relationships and domestic violence with our friends and whānau, we are helping to build safe and healthy communities. Abuse is never OK. Seeking help if you think you are being abused, or think that you might be abusing someone, is a strong thing to do. Supporting those who are experiencing abuse, or who may be unaware of their own abusive behaviours, shows that you care and that you want them to be happy.

Check out the section below
 to find places you can go for more information, or to get support if you need it.

Organisations That Can Help

Domestic Violence and Sexual Abuse Services

Women's Refuge

Women’s Refuge

If you are living in fear in your relationship or in your family, or know someone who is, you can get help right now. We offer all women in New Zealand and their children free advice, emergency accommodation and confidential advocacy services provided by women.

0800 REFUGE (733 843) (24 hours everyday)

Shakti Logo


Shakti is a not-for-profit community organisation working in the area of women’s development, empowerment and domestic/family violence intervention, prevention and awareness. We provide culturally competent support services for women, children and families of Asian, African and Middle Eastern origin.

0800 SHAKTI (24 hours everyday)

Help Logo

HELP Auckland

HELP provides support for survivors of sexual violence – if you need to make a report to the police, get help to manage the fallout, or just talk about what happened.

09 623 1700 (24 hours everyday)

HELP Wellington

HELP offers crisis intervention, counseling, prevention and education services.

04 499 7532 (24 hours everyday)

Shine Logo Tagline

Shine (Te Kakano Tumanako)

We are a national domestic abuse charity making homes violence free.

0508 744 633 (9am to 11pm, 7 days)


Find Support (ACC)

Helping you access ACC-funded support following sexual abuse or assault, in your time, on your terms. Search by therapists for experience working with LGBTIQ people.

Queer, Trans* and Takatāpui Specific

OUTLine Logo


Whatever is on your mind, from coming out, to heading out, friends to lovers, mothers to brothers, sometimes you just need to talk. OUTLineNZ volunteers don’t judge or tell you what to do; they provide support and appropriate information in a safe and friendly atmosphere.

0800 OUTLINE (688 5463) (9am-9pm weekdays, 6pm-9pm weekends)

Wellington Gay and Lesbian helpline

Gay And Lesbian Helpline Wellington

We offer caring and confidential support, information and acceptance to callers. As well as serving the gay and lesbian community, Helpline responds to those who have an interest in gay and sexual orientation issues.

04 473 7878 (7.30pm – 9.30pm Sundays) Voice messages will be responded to.

Tiwhanawhana Trust

Tiwhanawhana Trust

Tiwhanawhana is a kapa haka, support and advocacy group for takatāpui, their whānau and friends. Tiwhanawhana is based in Wellington.

RainbowYOUTH Logo


RainbowYOUTH is a charitable organisation providing support, information, advocacy and education for queer and trans* young people, their friends and whānau, and those who work with them.


ITANZ is a New Zealand registered charitable trust and provides information, education and training for organisations and professionals who provide services to intersex people and their families.

The I’m Local Projec

tI'm Local Kiwi Transparent copy

The I’m Local Project has a region-by-region directory of all the awesome LGBTIQ groups and organisations around Aotearoa.



Information and Support

Its Not OK LogoIt is OK to ask for Help

The It’s not OK campaign is a community-driven effort to reduce family violence in New Zealand. Its goal is to change attitudes and behaviour that tolerate any kind of family violence.

0800 456 450 (9am – 11pm everyday)

Safe LogoSAFE

Treatment and advice for those who have caused harm, or are worried that they might.

New Zealand Police LogoPolice

Diversity liaison officers provide liaison between Police and gay, lesbian, bisexual, transgender and intersex (GLBTI) communities.

Man AliveMan Alive

Run by men for men, Man Alive is dedicated to working in straightforward and practical ways, providing counselling and programmes to strengthen relationships with partners, children, family and friends.

0800 TANE ORA (0800 826 367)

Other useful information and support

YouthLine LogoYouthline

Toll free helpline and lots of useful information for young people in Aotearoa.

0800 37 66 33

community law LogoCoalition of Community Law Centres

Free legal help throughout Aotearoa.

Youth Law LogoYouthlaw

YouthLaw Tino Rangatiratanga Taitamariki is a free community law centre for children and young people nationwide. We offer free legal services to anyone under 25, or those acting on their behalf.

0800 UTHLAW (884 529)

CAB LogoCitizens Advice Bureau

0800 FOR CAB (367 222)

Village Collective

A charitable trust that aims to support Pasifika communities with sexual and reproductive health needs.


For more services available in your area, see:

Family And Community Services directory

Family Justice Services